If you’re fishing for a compliment, are you allowed to say “thank you” when you get one? Or should you quickly return the compliment from whence it came?
I’ve noticed those who fish for compliments seem to be more concerned with hoarding praise, rather than spreading it around.
Are we willing to acknowledge our mistakes or even our weaknesses? Can we learn from those mistakes? Are we able to work on our weaknesses?
Imagine being an NFL team that is 10th best at offense, defense, and special teams, with some small tweaks, you can be a top-5 team. But if you’re not willing to acknowledge that you’re ONLY the 10th best, you won’t learn from your mistakes and you can’t improve them.
Adversity is an opportunity for growth. The greatest deception men suffer is often from their own opinions.
If you can’t see where you can improve, your opinion that everything is “good enough” will ensure that it never gets better than that.
Think about what won’t happen next and consider how that can add ideas to whatever you’re working on. At the core of creative block is an inability to think outside the box. That box might be the limitations you have on the current project or the box of commonly accepted norms.
Instead of thinking about what happens, think about what doesn’t happen, what isn’t connected, and what isn’t immediately obvious.
What if I change its name, make it bigger, or smaller, or lighter, or heavier? What if I add something, or remove something, make it stronger, weaker, more agile, more immovable, etc…
Keep asking these questions and they’ll start to become second nature in your process of creating art.
We think problem-solving is a matter of finding the right answer to the problem. However, problem-solving and getting better at solving any problem is a matter of asking the right question first. “Is there a different or better way of looking at this problem?”
Looking for the right answer is expecting something from others, but seeking the right question is something you control. Therefore, successful problem-solving most often requires us to reframe the initial question and break down our assumptions.
They ask a million questions and they challenge things that don’t make sense to them. Because of this, we strangle curiosity in the cradle of our children’s lives and teach them that it’s best to stick to the safe roads of accepted norms.
Like much of reason and rationale, the concern is for the momentary relief and betterment of man’s condition right now, but little regard is paid to the future of the human race as a whole.
The child’s curiosity fuels the wellspring of any genius he or she may possess across their adult life.
Curiosity opens a door to freedom but leaves one at the risk of looking stupid. Better to appear stupid, than to trap your mind in a cage.
What would happen if children were able to embrace their curiosity, rather than have a biting response to every dumb question? Could our sacrifice of time and energy to answer the curious child become a boon for the whole of society?
Curiosity gives us the drive to learn and explore new things. The unbridled curiosity of children makes them masters of learning. This constant state of learning ensures the child’s brain retains maximum neuroplasticity, which then makes learning even easier. So the cycle of curiosity not only drives us to learn new things but makes it easier to learn new things as well. I suspect that we become more “set in our ways” as we get older because we stop learning and lose some of that “plasticity” in our brain, which makes curiosity and learning more difficult or painful.
The same curiosity and desire to satisfy that intense desire for what is new is the same force that seeks satisfaction as we scroll through social media feeds.
Interesting to think that the agent of such learning before social media, has become the agent of such time-wasting in those of us who have access to social media and instant-media entertainment options. We chase the context switch to satisfy our curiosity rather than learning real things to satisfy the itch.
Whenever you are facing a difficult decision between two things, choose the more difficult option. If the easier option was the right one, you wouldn’t be thinking about it. It would be done. Thus, the more difficult decision is probably the correct one and your brain is trying to trick you into taking the easy, but wrong, way out.
Like all things, this is a general rule and there are exceptions. But, generally, it is helpful.
Children learn by emulating their parents. So why are we so afraid to copy the people we look up to? If you overcome the fear of being a copycat, you 10x your growth and learning.
They’ve figured out the formula for success, so copy what they’re doing with humility. Once you’ve honed your skills by copying them, add your own spice and flavor. Just like that, you will have developed your own style and it will look great and feel professional.
Don’t be afraid to emulate in the process of learning. Examine the art of others and think about why they did what they did and emulate that.
This is the way to greater success faster than you can imagine.
“Action and growth compound, but so do fear and comfort. You’re either compounding forward or backward. You choose.”
I’m starting to think about the plans for next year. Every year since I started writing in this blog, I’ve had some form of a plan for the next year. Yet, over the past three years, I have failed spectacularly to accomplish the things I wanted. Sure, I’ve learned a lot on the way, but I simply have not delivered at the high level I expect of myself.
I’m working to outline my plans for 2023 and I have a sneaking feeling that this upcoming year will be a truly great year in terms of getting back on track and finally putting together a great year of work.
It’s been very difficult to contend with shifting priorities and not having the time and dedication to my primary business since mid-2019. Three years have felt like forever, but 2023 will be different.
My hope is that I feel some pain and sadness to leave 2023 behind next December. Because 2023 will be the year that changes my life in all the best ways.
When I’m working on a photo shoot and I finally get the lighting just right, it’s tempting to rest right in that spot and get the photos we might get. And those photos would be good enough. Good enough pays the bills and good enough gives you moderate success.
If “great” is the end goal, however, the first creative breakthrough we have rarely is the best we can do. We must continue pressing beyond the first exciting moment. That is the moment to which we must not be a prisoner.
When I write a blog post and finally get it all to fit together, the temptation is to publish it right away. However, if I go back and re-write the post, it is better the second time around 98% of the time.
I believe this is true with virtually everything you can do in life. It’s just very difficult to enter back into the uncomfortable position of not knowing how it’s going to work out when we’ve already discovered a solution that seems good enough.
I re-wrote this blog post (it’s much better this time,) I re-light photoshoots all the time, I rebuild scripts for videos, I re-edit video productions I’m working on, I re-wrap gifts, I re-read books, and I re-tell stories. They’re always better the second time around.
A funny thing happens when I take a few days off. No matter if I take a few days off from working out, or making videos, or even something simple like writing these blog posts.
Getting started again feels 10x more difficult. There is a feeling of discomfort and an utter lack of confidence. I have no idea why.
Also, when I start writing, working, taking photos, making videos, working out, etc… it’s the most fun thing ever. It becomes easy in about twenty minutes and I sit there wondering why I let the break ever happen.
I know I need to take breaks, but the difficulty of getting restarted is frightening. Do I avoid burnout by taking enough breaks? Or do I take breaks and risk never getting started again?
The choice is difficult when I take a few days off.
Focus on the direction you’re headed, not how fast you’re moving.
Imagine moving fast only to realize you’ve gone the wrong way. Slow and sustainable progress in the right direction is the best way.
I’ve been using a method of double-reading books to help me to understand what the author’s main point is and the direction he’s heading. It also helps me get through a book very quickly to determine if it’s worth investing a week or two in order to read it.
The double reading method I’ve been using works like this: Read a book once, but very quickly to get through it in an hour or so of reading time. Then read the book a second time, but deeply.
With this second read-through, you have a better idea of the over-arching point so you will pick up on the foundation the author is laying early in the book. It really helps you to conceptualize and extract value from the book.
It’s a foregone conclusion that as you get older, your body begins to break down. You can’t run as fast, or as long, and you can’t jump as high. Everything becomes a little more difficult.
Your brain, however, doesn’t get worse as you get older; unless you let it. The connections that fire back and forth through your brain’s synapses are almost like little sparks that jump from neurotransmitter to neurotransmitter and these little highways of information can fall into disrepair. If you don’t use them and exercise them, that is.
If you exercise them and do cognitively challenging things, you can actually improve your brain’s function as you get older. Treasure your mind and do challenging things and reap the rewards as you grow older.
We overestimate how good other people are, but underestimate how valuable we are. The funny thing is, we think we’re great when there are no stakes. We think we’re cool, or worthy of respect, or deserve that vacation, etc…
But when it comes to acting worthy of things that matter, we suddenly humble ourselves to a far greater degree. Asking for more money, taking on that scary project, or having the guts to step up and share what you’ve learned with others all are difficult.
So what would happen if we humbled ourselves in our personal life, but believed that we are more valuable in our professional life? (Hint: people will probably like you much more and you’ll make more money.)
Your brain is a tool inside of your physical body. The question is, will you run your brain, or will your brain run you?
Is your brain something that you can use? Or is your brain something that determines how you are and what you’ll ever amount to?
“I think continually of those who were truly great.
Who from the womb, remembered the soul’s history.
Through corridors of light where the hours are suns,
Endless and singing. Whose lovely ambition
Was that their lips, still touched with fire,
Should tell of the spirit clothed from head to foot in song.
And who hoarded from the spring branches
The desires falling across their bodies like blossoms.
What is precious is never to forget
The delight of the blood drawn from ageless springs
Breaking through rocks in worlds before our earth;
Never to deny its pleasure in the simple morning light,
Nor its grave evening demand for love;
Never to allow gradually the traffic to smother
With noise and fog the flowering of the spirit.
Near the snow, near the sun, in the highest field
See how those names are feted by the wavering grass,
And by the streamers of white cloud,
And whispers of wind in the listening sky;
The names of those who in their lives fought for life,
Who wore at their hearts the fire’s centre.
Born of the sun they traveled a short while toward the sun.
And left the vivid air signed with their honor.”
The hardest part is getting back on track after a setback because of how bad you can feel about the setback.
When you are in a groove and moving well, it’s pretty easy to maintain momentum.
But, when you lose momentum, it’s very hard to get up to speed again.
Work to develop systems in your life that make it much less likely that you will fall behind. Because catching up is the hardest part.
Do it right away. There is no sense in planning micro-tasks. They appear and they get squashed right away.
My only exception to this rule is when I’m engaged in a block of deep work with all distractions shut down. Then I jot a quick note on my pad and ensure I never leave my state of “deep” thinking/working.