Sometimes it’s valuable to take on projects that we’re likely to fail at. There is a value in “getting in over our heads.” Becoming comfortable with the uncomfortable.
Because when we reach higher than our toes can lift us, we dare to be great. While that will often leave us with a failed objective, it will, at times, deliver us success on the grandest scale.
Take the risks, jump into the deep end, and dare to be great.
Many conversations lack true interaction and understanding. In such conversations, one person is usually dominating the discussion, while the other person is passively listening without actively engaging. True communication requires a back-and-forth exchange of ideas and perspectives, where both parties actively listen and respond to each other.
Think about how often in conversations we think more about what we want to say, rather than listening while the other person is speaking.
The lack of genuine communication in many conversations can not only lead to misunderstandings but could also prevent connections from forming. To have a successful conversation, it is important to put aside one’s own agenda and actively listen to the other person’s perspective, allowing for a more equal and productive exchange of ideas.
“Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of a witness.”
There are many different cyclists with whom I ride bikes (when the weather is warm and nice.) Among cyclists online, there is generally a healthy community of positive encouragement and it’s all quite nice.
I have noticed that particularly talented riders often get praised for the outcome of their rides and not the ride itself.
The example would be, “Wow, John, you averaged 20mph on that ride! Incredible!” Or something like, “You rode over 100 miles today! That’s a huge accomplishment!”
These are all nice things and things that I very rarely do. I can’t help but wonder if it takes some of the joy away from the process of just riding your bike when you feel labeled as “the guy who always goes 20mph” or any other label that is thrust upon you.
I’ve learned that when I pay compliments to my children, friends, or colleagues in work, I try to praise the thought that goes into something and the process that made the result possible.
I think praising the creative for their creativity or thoughtfulness is more valuable to them than praising work they did that happens to be “creative.”
For the cyclists, I try to praise their toughness, tenacity, willingness to train and get in shape, and determination to ride long or fast. You can be tough and only ride 35 miles, or willing to train hard and still not break 17mph.
You may also be ultra-talented and creative and not yet have the most incredible work. Not yet, at least.
If we want to motivate somebody to do something good, we should explain to them how it helps others, not simply how it helps them.
You could say, “when we wash our hands, we help to prevent ourselves from getting sick.” Or you could say, “when you wash your hands, you help prevent others from getting sick.”
When we think about consequences toward ourselves, we invoke the logic of consequence in the decision-making process. But when we think about the consequence toward others, we invoke the logic of appropriateness.
This logic of appropriateness shifts our focus to a contemplation of our values, what is morally right, and our obligation of right and wrong. This would include both personal and professional moral obligations.
For ourselves and others, it’s good to know how it affects us, but it’s better to understand how it affects those around us.
The value we bring is the most important element that we can take to a new job or a new project.
The client wants to see your portfolio or your degree before they hire you, but both of those things are relics of the past. Tomorrow is a new day and there is no guarantee that your best work is still ahead of you.
However, both the degree and the portfolio give prospective clients (or bosses) some sense of security in hiring you for the job.
For the artist, it is important to use the portfolio as a tool to gain more work, not as something that gives a sense of entitlement. That was yesterday’s work. The best and most valuable people don’t rest on the laurels of what they’ve done in the past.
The important thing is the value you bring today and the success you foster for tomorrow. Work hard on important things.
Laughter is contagious, but when you laugh at your own jokes, it makes them less funny and causes you to appear self-conscious.
So the quote by French novelist, Honoré de Balzac rings true. “To provoke laughter without joining in it greatly heightens the effect.”
You only need to have the confidence that the audience will see that your joke is funny.
The Overton Window has to do with what policies are acceptable to the mainstream at any given time. There is a sort of Overton Window effect with all creative ideas.
You might approach your boss, or a client, with a brilliant idea. However, even the boss who loves creative solutions might not understand the idea if it’s “too unique.”
There is a sweet spot with introducing new ideas. Not so normal that it’s boring, but not so creative that it’s confusing.
Introducing brilliant or new ideas is like blowing a soap bubble. Be gentle and shift the window of acceptable ideas. If you push too hard, the bubble will burst.
One of the most difficult things about creative work is convincing other people that your idea is a good one.
We, too often, fall into the trap of assuming that everybody sees the breadth and depth of our “ingenious” idea exactly as we do. After all, we know our idea inside and out.
However, selling an abstract idea is difficult. Selling a novel solution you’ve come up with is even more difficult.
The solution is familiarity. Connect your solution to commonly known items, processes, and ideas to quickly explain (and generate a level of comfort about) your idea.
Find commonalities in books, history, technology, behavior, sports, etc… and explain your ideas and solutions that way to help bridge the gap from an abstract idea to something concrete in the mind of the person listening to your idea.
A critic is a legless man who expects to teach you how to run.
Make small changes. It’s all you can do today anyway. Big changes happen because you’ve spent weeks, months, and years making small improvements every day.
Small bad habits each day also compound over time. So focus on doing one small thing today and you have 365 drips of water in your bucket after one year.
Start small. Start now.
Shaking your fist in the face of (lawful and good) authority is popular, but humility (even when you’re sure you are right) is far more beneficial.
“To punish me for my contempt for authority, fate made me an authority myself,” –Albert Einstein
It’s a hard life to be a leader when you have never been willing to be led.
We all think to-do lists are essential. But they may also prevent us from maximizing our effectiveness.
It’s comfortable to see all our work laid out on a list in front of us. However, I have found that I am much more effective and open to changes throughout the workday if I only keep a loose collection of general projects I want to make some progress on each day.
The goal is to get started with work right away, not dream about work to be done. Once I am started with work, I am more open to the reality of the day and what I can handle. It is at that point that I lock in a to-do list.
This keeps me open to the flexibility that I need throughout the workday. It also helps eliminate the stress of being an hour behind schedule by lunchtime on my to-do list.
Note: The same holds true for time blocking a day of work. Instead of scheduling tasks into rigid 15-30 minute blocks, I instead reserve hour-at-a-time blocks for either “deep” or “shallow” work and just fill those hours with productive work on whatever projects I choose.
There is one trait that I try to avoid in myself and when I hire people to work for me. This is the demeaning of other people or organizations that they’ve previously worked for.
We show our own character when we describe others. Whether they’re people or companies.
When a man has had problems with all of his previous employees or all six companies he’s worked for in the past, the problem might not be the company or the other people. It’s probably the guy.
If we speak well of those who aren’t around to defend themselves, we show confidence, competence, and responsibility.
Also, people will take your complaint more seriously when you’re not complaining all the time.
The mistakes we regret are the things we didn’t do, not the things we did.
Inaction, when we’re afraid, is easy at the moment, but it’s what we regret most later on.
Action now is difficult, but we regret that much less later on.
If we could do the past over, most of us would hold back less and do more.
It’s easy to miss the difficult parts of success. Success seems great to all of us. If you have that success, you have nothing to be upset about anymore… right? Wrong!
When you start becoming successful, you have more to lose when you fail than if you have no success at all. This becomes a major stressor.
Falling from failure to total failure is bad, but it’s much worse to fall from semi-successful to failure. Hence we see why some people can’t handle the pressure that comes with success.
We're usually more fixated on the potential for a small failure and we completely ignore the potential for the same action having incredible success.
We must develop the courage to continue operating freely and recklessly even when we wear the heavy jacket of success.
The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually afraid to make one. The greatest risk you can make in life is being afraid to take risks.
If you’re going to create content, how much content can you create before you over-expose yourself to the world and people start to hate you/your work?
Over the past ten years, I have always assumed that if I create too much, people will get sick of watching my videos. This is true, however, we need to understand how much is “too much?”
This mindset has caused me to pull punches and hold back from creating as much as I should.
We probably only create about 5% of what we would need to before people get sick of our content. Most people don’t create enough because we all see the people who create way too much and we assume that everybody does that.
Spoiler: Most people don’t. Most people hold back.
We should be creating 10-20x what we are if we want to create an impact.
In fact, the more you create and the more familiar people become with your work, the more they like it. People enjoy your artwork, content, or videos more, the more they see it. That is unless you over-share.
Share more, not less. You probably won’t over-share if you’re a person who has concerns about over-sharing.
It was Albert Einstein who stated, “Great spirits have always encountered opposition from mediocre minds.” So how can I get people to listen to my ideas when they aren’t status quo?
I believe the answer to be that we must build respect by doing the quiet work that delivers value.
When we try to influence the room but lack the respect of those in it, we are viewed as difficult, self-serving, and generally annoying.
That respect, that status, cannot be given. It is earned. Like all real respect, you can have to merit it.
Work hard, over-deliver, and the rest comes with it. Influence, respect, and a certain amount of power to change systems and voice opinions that otherwise would have been ridiculed or fallen on deaf ears.
Sadly, too often, we skip the hard work part and demand respect, preferment, and influence. Your idea is probably good, but if you don't have the respect of the room, it simply doesn’t work.
In the mid-1150s Emperor Frederick I conducted a military campaign to subdue much of northern Italy. He laid siege to one of the wealthy cities. In this city was a young nobleman known to be boastful and full of himself. The young man gathered his arms and armor and rushed out the gate to fight.
As he did this, he yelled at the other young men to hurry up and suggested that their “slow pace indicated that they were afraid to fight.” He boasted that he would go and confront the enemy himself.
He raced along with his horse the miles toward the enemy. While riding, he encountered some fellow soldiers who had been wounded and were retreating. After seeing them, he slowed the horse's pace considerably.
A few moments later, he could hear the noise of the battle and saw it from afar the fighting. At this, he brought his horse to a complete stop.
People afterward asked him why he did not participate in the battle after so much talk. He responded that he did not feel so stout or courageous when he wore the armor. The weight of the armor prevented him from engaging.
We can all talk the talk, but the armor is heavy when you get out there to do it.
I wonder if people who grow up in Mississippi think that everyone uses the name of their own state to count seconds?