Just keep trying

We learn from our failures. The baby learns to walk when she falls down. Unlike the self-doubting creative type, she tries to get back up and doesn’t care about failure. She’s completely forgotten it within a moment or two. Without a few stumbles, she would have never learned to walk.

Without our creative stumbles, we won’t create anything worthwhile. We just have to find a way to forget the failures, but not before we learn a little bit from them.

Keep trying. Don’t let the fear of failure paralyze you.

The things we learn

We probably only learn what exactly our parents did for us when we have children of our own. It’s the stuff that falls between the cracks, the stuff that everyone forgets about, that you realize when you have to go through it.

Wish for your ideas to be attacked

There is an old saying that goes, “He who knows only his side of the case, knows little of that.” To be able to critically think and examine any issue requires that a person should admit the fact that his opinion may be false, or at least not as precise as it could be.

When you are open to hearing the critiques or anger of other people toward your ideas and opinions, you open yourself to being forced to question and examine what you believe and improve.

A belief that is not grounded in some deep conviction is a belief that will give way to the slightest resistance or argument to the contrary. If an ungrounded belief is actually the truth, but the person who believes it can’t explain it, that is a belief held by faith. In some things faith is understandable, but in many things, we have faith in things that are little more than superstitions.

Always demand a deadline

A deadline gives you clarity and urgency to get your work done. It makes art better because it helps you publish your artwork. Deadlines stop you from trying to make everything perfect. Instead of being perfect, you focus on being different. Different is better than perfect, but it’s impossible to be truly different or perfect. Different is just easier.

We’re hypocrites and we see everyone else’s faults

We read in many major systems of morality throughout history about an idea so eloquently outlined in the Bible. This idea is that we should not be bothered by the speck in our brother’s eye, because we have a beam in our own eye we should be focused on getting rid of.

It’s very easy for us to see the evil in others and to point out the bad people “over there.” But when it is time to honestly assess ourselves, we extend all manner of charity over our bad behavior.

As Solzhenitsyn puts it, “The line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being.”

We always seem to make it onto the good side of the fence, but maybe we should be a little more critical of our own behavior.

Be the fire and hope for the wind

A small candle flame is fragile. A slight wind will extinguish it with ease.

A fire, on the other hand, gets stronger as it is blown by the wind.

So in life, let us be the fire and hope for the winds of difficulty by which we learn, grow, and gain strength.

I’ll sleep when I’m dead

When I was in my twenties, I’d use the phrase, “I’ll sleep when I’m dead.” Now that I’m in my thirties, I prefer to sleep when bedtime comes around, and sometimes even with a nap in between. I’m sleepy and can’t wait until I’m dead to get some rest. I guess I’ve officially crossed into middle age and it’s pretty nice.

Don't start with motivation

Winners don’t look for motivation to get started. They start with a plan. They commit to that plan. Getting started and getting committed turns into motivation and a major change in your life.

Forget motivation and find a plan.

What’s been left behind

Don’t underestimate the hole your absence has left. We all have something unique to offer the world at large and most directly to our family and loved ones.

When we don’t offer ourselves to our families and loved ones, we pull our family a little further from the edge of a paradise on earth.

The cold summer of San Francisco

Mark Twain once said, “The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.” The microclimates of the Bay Area, but most specifically San Francisco, lead to some drastic temperature changes even a short drive away. I love this town for so many reasons and I hate this town for so many reasons. But undoubtedly, San Francisco has an advantage in the natural terrain of the area that not many places can match. If only the city was a little bit cleaner.

The grateful guest

The grateful guest remembers only the good offered to him by his host. The ill-willed guest remembers only what he did not get. Be a grateful guest in this world. Magnify the good of others and minimize the ill.

The power of simple and small

We are usually afraid to begin something new because we’re not established and all we can do is something small and simple.

Forget not that even the most complex systems in the world begin as simple things. In fact, some of the greatest impact is generated by the simplest functions.

Don’t let your inability to do complex things stop you from doing what you can. Simple and small is more powerful than you imagine.

Syntax and semantics

Isn’t it interesting to consider that we have systems that determine if a sentence is syntactically correct? You can plug in whichever nouns and verbs you like and the sentence will work.

We also have systems that determine if a sentence is semantically correct. Whether the words that are used make any sense and mean things that we understand.

With these systems, we can choose whichever nouns and verbs we like and plug them in where they belong and construct all kinds of interesting thoughts.

Sometimes the thoughts are out of place, totally random, and don’t seem to have much purpose. Like this flying ice cream cone… err blog post. I chose the correct word syntactically, by semantically it made no sense. See how fun that is?

The things that impress us

People are impressed by things that they are interested in and things that they can understand.

We should be constantly in awe of the impressive motion of molecules all around us and the way the world keeps moving, but we only become impressed when something becomes contextualized in a way we can see it, feel its impact, or understand how it might affect us.

Friends with confidence

I’ve been gifted with a few acquaintances in my life who have always shown such great confidence in my abilities. A confidence that is far beyond my own confidence in myself.

This is a great gift and taking the leap suggested by these friends has never been a bad thing. Not a single time.

I really appreciate it, even though I’m not quite sure why they have such confidence in me. A supportive acquaintance is a great thing.

Laying blame

Fault always lies with the one who is weak enough to lay the blame on others. Laying blame speaks louder than any other words and shows the character of the person.

Willing to work without benefits

When I was in my early twenties, I would jump at any opportunity that was presented even (maybe even especially) when I didn’t see any direct benefit.

There is always a benefit to being in the arena and not on the sidelines. You rarely see the value until after you begin participating, but you never see the value if you don’t get off your seat and jump into the ring.

I find myself pausing and asking “is this is worth it” when I am presented with opportunities these days. Perhaps I should stop thinking of them as opportunities and revert to thinking about them as adventures.

Get out there and do stuff. Meet people, make impressions, learn new things, be kind, share your gifts, have no expectations and you will find the world at your feet.

Everyone else is thinking about themselves

Reform must come from within, not from without. Nobody can convince you to be better or to want to be better. That must come from within you. A sort of spiritual change must take place.

Just as other people can’t convince you to change, so you should realize that you can’t change others or make them better.

It’s a strange dilemma because when you have a genuine desire for good toward others, it is impossible to let them destroy themselves without trying to interject. Even when you know those interjections will be fruitless, there is a deep inward force that practically compels you to try to do something, anything.

When a close friend, child, or sibling picks up a bad drug habit, or stops caring for their children, or any other number of things that are openly and apparently destructive to themselves and those around them, do you have a right to speak out? Or should each of us stand by quietly and wait for the destructive phase to pass and help clean up the mess?

Rightly or wrongly, you will often be labeled "controlling" or "nosey" (or any number of colorful epithets) by those whom you care for. The assumption is that you don’t really care about them. The assumption is that you simply want to control what they should or shouldn’t do. But the reality is that everyone else is thinking about themselves as much as you are thinking about yourself and therefore no one has any time to think about you and worry about controlling you as much as you think.

To watch a loved one fall into a destructive phase of life is sad and painful, but it’s impossible to help a person who doesn’t want to help themselves.